Buhtt sex?
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
Randomize
