talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
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