I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Randomize
