i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
He felt like a one man threesome
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
Randomize
