may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
She just used a chaser for red wine.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
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