No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
Do you remember whose house we're in?
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
Randomize
