it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
They took my balls.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize