I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Randomize
