Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
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