Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize
