Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
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