Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
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