It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
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