Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Randomize
