just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize
