it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
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