OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
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