ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
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