He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Randomize
