His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
