whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
So I just walked in on one of our neighbors having sex...on our couch.
WHAT?!
He apologized for staining our couch, then asked if he could make me a drink. Pretty sure he was still inside her while we were talking.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
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