Well apparently he's into motor boating.
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
I pour the whiskey from now on
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
Randomize
