I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
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