im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
