I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
I need a burrito and a hug.
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
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