Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
Randomize
