And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
Randomize
