Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
Still dying that you shit outside
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
Randomize
