just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
I currently don't understand fingers.
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