He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
How does one acquire holy water?
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
