Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
I CAN MOONWALK!
im going to pretend im pregnant so i can eat a lot then i will accidentally fall down the stairs
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
Randomize
