I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
she looked like the before picture.
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
