I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
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