I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
Randomize
