but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
Randomize