so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
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