if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
Randomize