This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
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