Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
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