he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
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