just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Randomize
