I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
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