I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
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