Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
Randomize
