What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
Randomize
