you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
I got Pilsbury cinnamon rolls for us to have tomorrow, but I don't have the willpower to leave them in my fridge overnight, so I am eating them all and getting us more in the morning
I love you more by the minute
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Randomize
