belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
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