The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
Randomize
