Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
Randomize
