Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
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