Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Randomize